Black Actress Update: Props to Queen Latifah For Making ‘Joyful Noise’
Posted on | January 16, 2012 | 19 Comments
About Us For Us
I saw the movie Joyful Noise over the weekend. I had no idea what it was about. I saw it with a girlfriend (who’s Asian), she was the one who recommended it. I think most of the reviews have been half and half regarding this film. It’s a musical, a comedy with small bits of drama.
The storyline is rather old fashioned, family friendly, and when I watched it, I felt it would be a perfect musical for the stage (Off or On-Broadway). I liked the music so much, I’m buying the soundtrack. By the way, I’m also a Dolly Parton fan. It was nice to see her in this film. Kirk Franklin shows up to do a song.
The Film’s Focus
One thing about Queen Latifah, when she makes a film with a black woman / women in it – she doesn’t take the spotlight off of them to share it with others. That will be part and parcel of why this film wont get high grades: there’s no storyline about any white girl(s) in this. It’s about black women: their friends, frenemies, families and men (black, white and Asian).
Yup, all the interracial couples in this movie involve black women. 
Think about that when others try to persuade you to see films where we are invisible, don’t exist, or only make up part of the background scenery.
The Audience
From my quick visual survey at the time, the demographics looked rather good: a mixed crowd of people over 25, although mostly white couples or white women with their kids.
That tells me that a variety of folks will come out to see a film with black women in the lead.
Praise
So, I stand up and applaud Queen Latifah for quietly putting out a movie, TV program, or whatever, year after year that focus on us. Somehow, she’s figured out how navigate the treacherous waters of Hollywood as an Executive Producer to get stuff done.
I hope more black women can do the same.
The Red Tails Discussion
Also, I wanted to point everyone to the awesome discussion over on What About Our Daughters regarding the lack of black women in the film Red Tails by George Lucas.
Ladies, at the end of the day, it’s your wallet, do as you please. 
Update: My bad … I should have mentioned Keke Palmer. Her singing is amazing. I say if they ever wanted to make a new and improved, yet younger version of, The Bodyguard, they’ve got their girl.
Tags: black actress > black actresses > executive producer > Hollywood > Joyful Noise > Keke Palmer > movies > Queen Latifah
Black Actress Update: Hollywood’s Shrinking Box Office
Posted on | December 30, 2011 | 33 Comments
I know if I made money the way Hollywood did, I’d be ecstatic. Especially when you have the most creative accountants in the world who can turn billions earned into “losses”. All legally, of course. That’s what you get for having the US Congress in your back pocket. I expect when their earnings decline even more, they will be asking for public funds to keep the business afloat (See General Motors). That will occur right after they make it illegal for anyone to say or watch anything on the Internet (pending legislative as of now).
But I digress, imagine being able to push garbage at people and compel them to head to a filthy, loud and uncomfortable theater just to sit through crappy schlock for nearly three hours? That clearly takes genius to run this con year after year, week after week and day after day. If they think they are losing money now, wait until everyone can download a film in the blink of an eye and re-create a movie theater at home without the nuisance, annoyance and hassle of a public one.
Nothing To See Here, Move Along
The box office take for Hollywood has been weak: headlines blurb about the lower attendance rates. A money quote from the BBC article:
“It’s unbelievable how bad it is,” said Hollywood.com analyst Paul Dergarabedian.
Are we supposed to weep for them? I thought this would be a bonanza year, since they have defenders, who say that films with too many black people – men and women, not just the guys – wont make money. This was the year of the whitest films around.
I’m usually a movie fiend, but this has been the year where I missed many of the “blockbuster films”, except for X Men: The Lamest Generation and Mission Impossible: Making Tom Cruise Hot Again. There may have been another, but I often forget a film the minute I leave the theater.
Come Back, Again, Ya Hear!?!
This was the year of sequels, remakes, prequels, comic books and animation. Proof of Hollywood’s emptiness.
The top 20 films of 2011, according to Box Office Mojo. I have a page that shows the same content of all the Top 100 films.
| 1 | Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2 | $381.00 | WB |
| 2 | Transformers: Dark of the Moon | $352.00 | P/DW |
| 3 | The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 1 | $272.00 | Sum. |
| 4 | The Hangover Part II | $254.00 | WB |
| 5 | Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides | $241.00 | BV |
| 6 | Fast Five | $209.00 | Uni. |
| 7 | Cars 2 | $191.00 | BV |
| 8 | Thor | $181.00 | Par. |
| 9 | Rise of the Planet of the Apes | $176.00 | Fox |
| 10 | Captain America: The First Avenger | $176.00 | Par. |
| 11 | The Help | $169.00 | BV |
| 12 | Bridesmaids | $169.00 | Uni. |
| 13 | Kung Fu Panda 2 | $165.00 | P/DW |
| 14 | X-Men: First Class | $146.00 | Fox |
| 15 | Puss in Boots | $143.00 | P/DW |
| 16 | Rio | $143.00 | Fox |
| 17 | The Smurfs | $142.00 | Sony |
| 18 | Super 8 | $127.00 | Par. |
| 19 | Rango | $123.00 | Par. |
| 20 | Horrible Bosses | $117.00 | WB (NL) |
The fresh entries: The Help, Bridesmaids, Super 8, Horrible Bosses, Rio and Rango. So, out of the top 20, roughly 6 of them were “original”, fresh-out-of-the-box material. Heh.
The Non-Mystery of the Twilight Lure
Honestly, doesn’t Breaking Dawn sound like a porn title, or is that just me?
The funniest thing I’ve read were reports of women having “seizures” at this latest Twilight film, and no one knew what it was. It’s called an orgasm, people. Sheesh. It’s the 21st century and female biology is still a mystery. Um, women like Twilight and Vampire flicks, because of the eroticism. The yearning, withholding and anticipating. He’s a bad boy, and an eternally powerful man who bites and licks the neck, targeting one of the erogenous zones of the female body.
Yeah, “seizures.” Okay.
The Black Actress: Inclusion or Exclusion?
Forgive me for not listing all shows, or movies with a black actress. If you find some with a black actress of interest, please add it to the comments section. Let’s look at the top films of the year and see if that hypothesis is true, you know: less black women (or nice black male actors) equals more money per film.
When I glance at cast credits, I look at the first 5 to 10. They get the most speaking roles, so even if a black actress gets one line and is part of the scenery – to me – that doesn’t count.
Films that include black women in starring roles also (animation doesn’t count):
1. The Help – love it or hate it, we got a film about being maids, in 2011. Thank you, Hollywood. Thanks so much. All we black women can do is still be maids in the 21st century. A black woman is First Lady, but these people have us doing roles cleaning some white woman’s toilet with dignity! whilst pretending that’s got something to do with civil rights. Alrighty, then.
2. Bridesmaids – big hit – from the people that brought us Hangover. Not sure how much of a role she played, but Kali Hawk (love the name) is in it.
Update: Somehow I missed Maya Rudolph, and she’s one of the stars!
Thank you for the tip, Vonnie!
3. X-Men – Does not have a black actress with two black parents, but a half-half of two half-half was in it. So, I flipped a coin and decided to include Zoë Kravitz.
Here’s the bottom 20 movies of 2011 for comparison:
| 80 | In Time | $36.00 | Fox |
| 81 | Colombiana | $36.00 | TriS |
| 82 | Sucker Punch | $36.00 | WB |
| 83 | J. Edgar | $36.00 | WB |
| 84 | Larry Crowne | $35.00 | Uni. |
| 85 | The Descendants | $35.00 | FoxS |
| 86 | 50/50 | $35.00 | Sum. |
| 87 | Drive (2011) | $34.00 | FD |
| 88 | A Very Harold & Kumar 3D Christmas | $34.00 | WB (NL) |
| 89 | Courageous | $33.00 | TriS |
| 90 | The Rite | $33.00 | WB (NL) |
| 91 | Arthur (2011) | $33.00 | WB |
| 92 | The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo (2011) | $32.00 | Sony |
| 93 | The Adventures of Tintin | $31.00 | Par. |
| 94 | The Debt | $31.00 | Focus |
| 95 | Priest | $29.00 | SGem |
| 96 | The Mechanic | $29.00 | CBS |
| 97 | Abduction | $28.00 | LGF |
| 98 | Beastly | $27.00 | CBS |
| 99 | Winnie the Pooh | $26.00 | BV |
| 100 | Killer Elite | $25.00 | ORF |
Anything Else We Need to Know?
An action film with a black actress is a miss, but the black actress as a maid might be up for an Oscar? Oh well.
1. Columbiana – Zoe Saldana. Perhaps she should stick to romances or something. Seriously, no one is going to believe that a 55 pound woman – soaking wet – can kick anybody’s ass.
2. Drive – Tiara Parker – don’t know if she has much of a role.
3. Larry Crowne – Tarina Pouncy – don’t know if she has much of a role.
4. Courageous – Eleanor Brown – don’t know if she has much of a role.
Notice that a lot of the big stars made spectacular flops this year? People are tired of them too.
Some of the bottom films are likely new releases, so those numbers will change for next year.
And that’s all folks….
Happy New Year.
Tags: 2011 > black actress > black women > box office > Hollywood > movies
Happy Holidays, Merry Christmas and the Floor Is Yours: Topics Are Open
Posted on | December 18, 2011 | 45 Comments
Have a good one everyone. If anyone wants to talk about stuff – the floor is open.
Seeing Mission Impossible this Sat. We’ll see if it’s worth the hype. And good on Tom Cruise for having a black actress co-star and for the second time!!!
Drink up, be merry and be very very good to yourself.
I like sharing the link love: BWE blogs and then some
Time to get your swirl on! IR Dating
Also check the sidebar under Love and Romance too.
I’m not compensated for the links. I just like to share information.
Tips for Today’s Negroes: A Lesson in Manners
Posted on | November 27, 2011 | 58 Comments
Who’s Your Daddy?
Yeah, yeah, I know a lot of you did not have Fathers to teach you how to be a gentleman. And the likelihood is high that your Mothers probably didn’t have the time, inclination, or interest in teaching any of y’all manners. Maybe everybody thought that lil man ShayQuan being rude and obnoxious was cute when you were 5 years old and eventually you’d grow out of it.
Unfortunately, for some of y’all, it never happened. For some reason, your boys on the street or that friendly Mr. Hamilton across town – that old guy who’d slide you a couple dollars every once in a while for your “services” – never bothered to give you a heads-up.
However, as a contemporary negro that loves to tell everyone that you are, “A grown ass man,” here are some worthy tips to show you are one, as opposed to being an overgrown, petulant knucklehead.
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These tips are obvious to most well rounded people, but unfortunately common sense is in short supply these days:
Stay Thirsty and Be Anxious to Learn
1. Learn to greet everyone you meet with a, “Good morning,” if the sun is coming up or until around 11:00 A.M. like Micky Ds.
2. Say, “Hello,” for the entire day. Smiling is not necessary, but it is helpful.
3. “How are you?” Is allowed after, “Hello.”
4. If you are asked, “How are you?” Reply with, “I am fine,” or “I am good.” No grammar Nazis here.
5. “Goodnight,” isn’t an invitation to talk more or a hookup. It serves the same purpose as, “Goodbye.”
6. Do not demand that any black woman or black girl, whether you are acquainted or strangers, smile at you. It is harassment. Don’t be proud of it. You don’t know who she knows.
7. Keep your voice even when you address any woman. Anything louder sounds threatening. Speak with a moderate tone.
8. Hold the door open for all women, children and even other men. Good manners isn’t just a “white” thing.
9. Speak clearly: mumbling makes you sound like a numbskull.
10. Do not treat black women or black girls as though they are easy scores, a potential main squeeze, work place buddy confidant, or source of joking material. Cat calls, nasty comments and hollering at us is not appreciated.
I know a number of us have gotten used to little, if any, kind of common courtesy, as opposed to what you slavishly bestow upon non-black women. However, please keep your contempt to yourself. Non-blacks may appreciate your derogatory “shuck and jive” routine, but a lot of black women do not.
11. You may not believe it, but a lot of us don’t care to exchange more than a few passing words in greeting. That sista who is standing around listening to you is quietly suffering. She doesn’t know how to cut you off, because you’ve made it obvious you’d make her life hell (at the job) if she does.
Truth of the matter is: no one cares about your love life, personal hygiene, lack of money, and endless baby Momma stories. Your life story isn’t nearly as enthralling as you might think.
12. Enough with the jokes. Richard Pryor most likely told all of the best ones. He was funny. You are not.
13. If we seem to be ignoring you – after an initial greeting – let it be forever known: WE ARE NOT THINKING ABOUT YOU. Despite what you read in the black media and the desperate black women who write for them: YOU ARE NOT THE CENTER OF OUR UNIVERSE.
14. If you would never say it to someone white, then do not say it to a black woman. Please, spare us.
15. Your Momma really is the only woman who will put up with you. So, get over yourself and leave your issues at home.
16. It is not the black woman’s fault, if her job is more demanding than yours. She’s paid her dues. And believe it or not, that didn’t come by sleeping with a “white man”, since most of our bosses are likely to be white women. We went to school and worked while you decided it was better to hang out with LaTrell’monte back in the hood.
17. Your sucky job is not our problem. It’s up to you to solve. I heard there’s plenty of high paying jobs in North Dakota.
Let’s see if you can work with the white men up there with your current attitude, instead of living off of a black woman down here where it’s “safe”.
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Sure, a few bits of the advice listed could apply to some black women. But being out-of-order seems to be a specialty of negroes.
I’m gonna say it again, as I’ve said it before: you are not entitled to special attention or deference from us. Let’s treat one another with respect, be polite in public and take it from there.
If what I wrote doesn’t apply to you, then don’t get upset.
Cheers.
Tags: black men > common sense > good black men > manners > purple unicorns
Black Culture As Defined by the Japanese
Posted on | November 20, 2011 | 12 Comments
MsMellody writes:
I would like you (Betty) to write a blog piece on the following Japanese news story. I came upon this video while just looking around on the web…to say that I was shocked would be an understatement.
Let me add this last bit of info – seeing that I am well past this age demographic ( young 20 somethings) I STILL was sadly impacted by this seeming caricature.
And when I say caricature…I really mean it in all it’s glory..a total summation of all the GLARINGLY tacky … outlandish … ways. But somehow the Japanese have synthesized everything we the audience of these blogs would NEVER want to be associated with- nor glamorized!!
That’s A Lot of Black Folks They’re Talking About
Oh man, we need to shut down the music and entertainment industry immediately. Forget Free Speech. Ignorance and stupidity on this level shouldn’t be allowed – in any country on this planet.
There are roughly 150,000,000 Japanese people in the world. I padded the number to include those scattered outside the country.
People who are pure blooded African and of African descent might roughly be nearly a billion, if not slightly more. ‘Cause as you know, there’s too many of us, at least according to the environmentalists who love to only show pictures of black people when they talk about overpopulation. What’s fascinating is that they reason in the same unpleasant direction as the white supremacist sites. Same difference on a bad day, right?
Am I to understand that the twits in Japan claiming they know “black culture” think this represents 1 billion people? I know I am being rhetorical here.
Whose Culture You Talkin’ About, Willis?
Unfortunately, it is a global world. Overflowing with toxic “entertainment” waste. The context of this is garbage in, garbage out. Nothing more. Even the mother in the clip is hip to her daughter’s optional lifestyle, “Sooner or later it will get boring.” Momma is right. Her chubby unattractive crooked teeth offspring might go into Goth next.
‘Cause it doesn’t make a person black or a part of “black culture”, if one:
- Has hair that turned “frizzy” in primary school.
- Goes to a tanning bed monthly, weekly, or even daily.
- Reads magazines showcasing “cool blacks”. WTF does that even mean?
- Watches music videos full of “cool blacks”.
- Attends late night clubs to hear hip hop.
- Has hair braided into small plaits. Even the ancient Romans and Greeks did that, along with the Egyptians.
- Has multiple piercings, wears tattoos and brightly colored or tacky clothing. I mean, seriously now? (Useless data: the first folks to wear tattoos in the USA among the “mainstream” folks were sailors. That was cool, because you understood – life was rough for them. That’s what tattoos represented. Tough guys making marks of their adventures.)
- And as we know, the list of stupid, made-up dumb stuff passing as “black culture” could go on…
Let’s be real: being black or of African descent is not an optional lifestyle, something that can be appropriated or worn like the latest fashion.
We Are Not Accessories For Any Funking Group
As Oshun eloquently stated:
I am trying not to throw up at that vid. Ok, this is not “Black Lifestyle”, but a lower class black subculture they are mimicking.
Perhaps a letter writing/email campaign is in order to make them recognize that this is not us and they need to be careful of their labels – to further delineate the separation?
I say glamorize and mimick away. It is a subculture. I don’t care what happens to the cretins that created this trash. I hope it all comes back to bite all the woman hating negroes in the butt. There are already new school white MCs thinking they can call ni@@@s ni@@@s – so good luck to all of them with that.
What I do not like is this, and this may not be the right word, appropriation, co-option of the Black woman’s image whether she be working class or lower class or not. What is up with these folks and thinking that that is ok?? First some WW do it on the sly and now this mess? Is this everyday black face? I am feeling some type of way about this and it is not good.
I can understand the entertainment value of hip hop. It serves to amuse and distract for the period of time one gets immersed in it. That’s all. Just like other forms of “art”.
Hey, Do That Thing You Do
And in similar fashion to Oshun, I would tell this group of Japanese:
“Go ahead. We know it is a strange, bizarre, weird, and artificial construct on your part, since you have no idea, and will never know the true essence of any black culture. There are multitudes of them. Just like you would be thrilled to tell my black behind I could never appreciate, understand, emulate or become Japanese. There’s no way on earth you could ever appreciate and understand what black culture is, or even know what a real black woman is like.
But keep playing at it: for me, it’s entertaining to watch you all look stupid.”
But Y’all Can’t Do That
Folks, lemme ask you this: Imagine if groups of us walked around with faces painted white, spoke a little Japanese, bowed at everybody, carried swords (I don’t think I’d mind that), wore kimonos, along with those odd flip flops and said we were living a “cool azz Japannezzy lifestyle”, having never stepped one foot in the country? Honestly, I think people would be calling up President Obama and asking him, “What’s up with that?”
To wrap up, I’ll say why this is a problem. In the words of Ms Mellody:
The very idea that people from other countries only take in and synthesize what they see on MTV, Youtube, BET, VH1 and the like. Just the very idea that THEY think this is the TOTALITY of Black culture..is just shocking in this day and age. ….And yet this is exactly the way some BWs present as well as BMs present to the world.
Just because some of us easily invite disrespect – and call it entertainment or “art” – for a few dollars, doesn’t mean all of us will.
We ain’t asleep, folks. We see what’s going on.
Thanks for stopping by.
Tags: black woman > black women > culture > Japanese > misogyny
Announcement: swirlingandmarriage.com
Posted on | November 20, 2011 | No Comments
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Introducing a website dedicated to dating, relationship, and coaching services for black American women who want to date interracially or internationally. Swirling & Marriage is brought you to by a truly awesome member of the BWE community Lorraine Spencer.
In 2010 Lorraine helped highlight some sisters, which achieved international newspaper coverage. She also placed ads in international and military papers for additional exposure. If there are men from around around the world that you ladies want contact with, Lorraine is the one who can help you find them. Or at least point you in the right direction. There are no guarantees, but the more men you meet the better the odds.
Swirling & Marriage was formally re-launched around the first week of October. Profiles of the women will reach people all over the US, Scandinavia (along with some other European countries maybe even Russia), Australia and New Zealand.
Swirling & Marriage is a great site with lots of articles, profiles, links, tips and other resources.
The contact email address is: swirlingandmarriage@gmail.com.
It is on Facebook as well. Go on over and Like the page. Information about services and fees are in the Notes Section.
Swirling & Marriage™ | Personal Coaching for Black Women Who Desire Interracial/International Marriage…& the Men Who Love Them!
Ladies, I wish you much success and happiness in your endeavors.
Tags: Black Women Empowerment (BWE) > dating > international > interracial > love > relationships > Swirling & Marriage
Site Update: Monday November 14, 2011
Posted on | November 14, 2011 | 13 Comments
And …
It is back in business time.
Comments are open.
What’s new, folks?
Cheers.
(Note: some tweaking will occur – it shouldn’t disrupt anything…)
Ladies, Is He Good Enough For You?
Posted on | September 20, 2011 | 11 Comments
As we often see in the news, or experienced based on observation, plenty of men reach powerful positions, have a lot of responsibilities, and will be totally, absolutely morally deficient. They will be amoral, immoral, with a massive touch of egotism. Oh, they’re Alpha Males alright, better known as dogs, not wolves. Dogs are wonderful animals, but you know I mean the two legged kind.
Ladies, don’t ever let anyone tell you that “everyone does it” or “all men are the same.” Have some standards. The media likes to plate up degeneracy like it’s the latest delicacy. All you’ll get is food poisoning down the road. Imagine the kind of society they are pushing us towards.
Has shame gone out of style? Do we really want to continue lowering the bar until adults have sexual relations with small children and call that progressiveness? Imagine a society where no one shows impulse control, like everybody driving through red lights, or drunk and high. Would you feel safe?
A society without moral codes and mutual trust yields chaos and bedlam. I’ve lived through two blackout with riots. I’m not exaggerating when I say those aren’t fun experiences. Imagine living with that all the time. And we know there are places around the world where this is the case.
I don’t know what it will take to stave off further decay in this society. We need a society full of strong families with honest people. Everyone has flaws. Everyone makes mistakes. But a world where people relish a world without any sort of decency ethos yields a declining standard of living for everyone. Without stability what we’ll get is … well, think of those Zombie Apocalypse books and movies having an element of truth to them.
We cannot predict the future. We cannot always assume what’s in the hearts of people. But you cannot have a decent life with someone who has no shame, feels no guilt, likes to tell a lot of little lies, stealing, bullying or cutting corners. He’s not worthy of you if he’s freely giving everyone around him the shaft. (Pun intended).
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Tags: decency > morals > No Wedding No Womb > NWNW > shame > society > zombies
Media Watch: Korean Dramas – How the Media Creates or Changes Perceptions
Posted on | September 16, 2011 | 13 Comments
Language Skills
I started watching these shows, since Hulu added this category. What’s interesting to me, is that I’m beginning to understand what the characters are saying in Korean. Words are floating around in my head, because they’re repeated so often. I can read a few words in some languages, but I’ve never picked up a language as fast as this one. I’ve always viewed myself as foreign language impaired. I’ve had Spanish in school. I’ve listened to Spanish for years, and I still cannot make heads or tails out of most of it.
In the Korean Dramas, the people speak slow enough that I can tie the English subtitles to the spoken words. The dialogue isn’t complex, very long or involved. On occasion, some characters that supposedly spent time in the US, or are Americans, make a determined effort speak to English. Although badly. Nearly everyone mumbles words they need to enunciate.
Media Image is Everything
Since watching these programs, I’ve come to realize that they aren’t made just for a Korean audience. They are created with an awareness that the rest of the world will be paying attention.
These shows have given me a different impression of Koreans, as opposed to the ones I’ve been acquainted with here in the USA. Do I see the portrayals as realistic? I don’t think that’s the point of the programs. Whatever images there have been of Korean men, have been modified, if not overhauled, by these shows.
According to a Washington Post article (from 2006), the success of the revamped or enhanced image of Korean men have done the following:
In recent years, the wild success of male celebrities from South Korea — sensitive men but totally ripped — has redefined what Asian women want… Gone are the martial arts movie heroes and the stereotypical macho men of mainstream Asian television.
…Yoshimura signed up last year with Rakuen Korea, a Japanese-Korean matchmaking service, to find her own Korean bachelor. And she is hardly alone. More than 6,400 female clients have signed up with the company…
In part, the new allure of Korean men can be traced to a larger phenomenon known as the “Korean Wave”…
…the number of foreign tourists traveling to South Korea leapt from 2.8 million in 2003 to 3.7 million in 2004. The bulk of the growth, South Korean tourism officials say, stemmed from Korean Wave-loving Asian women. Partial statistics for 2005 indicate the feminine tide has not yet let up.
For the South Koreans — who have long suffered discrimination in Japan and who have hardly been known as sex symbols — it all comes as something of a shock.
Entertainment industry leaders in Seoul credit the phenomenon to good marketing coupled with an uncanny response throughout Asia to the expressive nature of the South Koreans — long dubbed the Italians of Asia. A hearty diet and two years of forced military duty, industry leaders and fans insist, have also made young South Korean men among the buffest in Asia. Most important, however, has been the South Korean entertainment industry’s perfection of the strong, silent type on screen — typically rich, kind men with coincidentally striking looks and a tendency to shower women with unconditional love….
Throughout Asia and other countries, women are watching TV shows and movies to such an extent that they have become enamored of the fictional representation of a specific group of men. So here we have proof that there is a direct connection between a positive image of a group and the corresponding response to it.
What Some of the Guys Look Like
I find some of the Korean male actors smoking hot, some cute and others moderately good looking. Although I find the “fashion” on the shows rather odd looking, but hey, I congratulate men who aren’t afraid of being edgy.
 Cha Seung Won  Cha Seung Won: He's able to look so different each time. |
 Jung Gyu Woon: I have yet to see a show where he doesn't end up fighting.
 Kim Sung Soo: Love those lips. Puts my dirty mind into overdrive.
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 Kang Ji Hwan  Kang Ji Hwan: I love his nose.
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Positive propaganda: is enhancing imagery to increase the desirability of a group.
The entertainment industry, basically the media, alone is responsible for the complete overhaul of the image of Korean men, so much so it has made the men hot commodities for the women who travel the country looking for one as a husband. It’s overturned reality and made such an indelible impression on women just from watching Korean Dramas.
In case you ever wonder why black women have negative, degrading stereotypical images, always remember to thank Hollywood and our media. Think about it the next time you think it’s important to embrace the “othering” of black women with those “keeping it real” negative images.
If anyone really wants to improve the desirability, popularity and increase of desire for black women: the best looking have to be highlighted, the most sophisticated has to be highlighted and the most engaging, lively and lovely ones have to be embraced.
Otherwise, we’re just shooting ourselves in the foot.
So, think about who you are embracing if the only thing they highlight about black women is constantly negative or off-putting. Those people aren’t doing you any favors. They’re deliberately sabotaging you.
****
Update: Korean Men Marriage Rates
I was asked to provide some data, so I dug up some stats. If they seem funky to anyone, please put up the correct numbers.
Throughout the world, more males than females are born. This imbalance is natural. However, in Asian countries it is exasperated by female reduction from sex selection in the womb (abortion), export adoption of girls, and other extreme methods. The result is a population of males outnumbering females. Based on the gender imbalance in Korea, social changes, population movement to urban areas, there are more men than women available and interested in marriage.
So, whom do Korean men marry? Funny enough, it turns out they marry all women. Although black women are a miniscule portion of the population in Korea, there are likely marriages between the two. With the USA having 1.3 plus million Koreans, it turns out that they are the East Asian men black women are most likely to marry. Certainly not in significant numbers overall, but it does happens.
And I’m just as surprised as y’all are by that information.
In 2005, 14% of all marriages in South Korea were marriages to foreigners (about 26,000 marriages); most were Korean men marrying other Asians. Government figures show the number of Koreans marrying foreign spouses increased from 4,710 in 1990 to 33,300 in 2009. And numbers are expected to continue rising. More than 100,000 women among South Korea’s 1.2-million foreign population are estimated to be foreign brides.
Bonus
YouTube link: the marriage between a Korean man and an African American woman. The wedding is awesome; sexy and sweet too.
Tags: Asian man > black women > images > interracial > korean dramas > marriage > media watch > stereotypes
Hey Ya Song – 2 Versions
Posted on | August 21, 2011 | 1 Comment
I like this a little more. Sung by Obadiah Parker. It’s a slowed down earthy version, sounds a bit country.
Here’s the original by OutKast. Andre’s not afraid of being flamboyant, is he?
And where can I find someone to do my hair as nice as his?
Relationship Barriers: Black Women, White Men and Other Non-Black Men
Posted on | August 16, 2011 | 9 Comments
Note: Let me put my caveats up front. This post obviously does not apply to each and every black woman, since some of us are flexible, flirtatious, and at ease with white and other non-black men.
The Swirl Imperative: Becoming More Social
There is no shame in lacking a flirting game or being a bit socially inadequate in mixed company – at this juncture in your life. You know how it goes: sitting at a table with your girlfriends, like a hostage, segregated from everyone else, because they’re uncomfortable at that social event and by design do everything to keep you from getting your groove on.
I believe in the power of a couple of Cosmos and Fuzzy Navels!
I’m always hopeful we’ll grow out of staying socially segregated, because when we integrate – that increases our interactions with white, Latino, Asian and other non-black men. The more men you meet, the more likely you are to meet Mr. Right for marriage, 2.5 kids and picket fences. And all that good stuff.
Relationship Barriers: The Strange Tensions
I appreciated the candor of this testimony. It reveals why some white men, and by extension other non-black men, are wary of approaching black women.
The following comments are by Carlos, which I edited to highlight some points:
- I’m a white man in my late 30s… Well, not completely white, but basically white for other people’s perception. I love women, and I’m also a bit of a sex addict- always have been, since my teens. I love sex, and more than anything I love to give women pleasure.
- That said, the intesity of the debate and people’s feelings around BW/WM relationships and sex have always been challenging for me. I am attracted to so many types of women, and appreciate so many different things, and black women are no exception.
- But where I’m normally just lustful and girl-crazy, I am more cautious with black women. The controversy, history and frankly less clear flirtatious interest from black women definitely factor in and give me pause. And it’s not for lack of adoration for black women on my part, trust me.
- But it feels more complicated, potentially, than with other women. Of course I’m generalizing, but I hope you get the idea. And really, I think that tension reflects race relations and race (mis) undertanding in general.
- My first girlfriend and sex partner in high school was a black girl, and I have had two relationships with black women since- one lasting for 3 years monogamously and another a friendly casual sexual relationship with a neighbor that was off/on for five years.
- I hope for more in the future.
- On a cultural note, I think a lot of Generation X white guys like me who were raised in liberal post-hippie households, growing up and learning about sex involved a positive open attitude about sex that fostered a lot of emphasis on women’s pleasure and orgasm. I basically learned that that defined good sex. Works for me, and I think that might explain the scenario that white men are versatile, creative, long-lasting and giving lovers.
Thank you for your perspective, Carlos.
Yeah, I know he’s talking about SEX, SEX and more SEX, but he’s also admitting – as a regular guy – that he finds black women as attractive as other women. Far too often some of us like to hang our hats on men not finding us attractive, so that’s not the case here.
He’s interested, but he cannot tell if you are. He’s interested, but he hesitates, because of the historical racial and sexual “drama”.
So, I have a few questions for everyone:
- Do we stress the racial aspect in our interracial relationships too much?
- Are we working the topic of race to the point of fracture?
- Is our flirting ability impaired? Would it make a big difference getting it fixed?
- Are we the ones bringing racial tension(s) to our interactions with non-black men?
- Are we letting outside forces create this tension? You know, taking control of your love life where they have no business being involved.
- What would it take to alleviate those sexual and racial tensions? (Aside from great sex.)
And everyone is free to add their own thoughts….
Tags: black women > interracial > relationships > social inadequacy > white men
Black Women: Why is the Wall Street Journal, and the media, still talking about our marriage prospects?
Posted on | August 10, 2011 | 36 Comments
I liked this comment by Daphne so much, I made it a separate post. Check out the following.
Regarding the WSJ* article making the rounds:
I found it bizarre that this was in the The Wall Street Journal*, just like I thought it was bizarre there was a similar article about black women in The Economist** several months (maybe a year?) ago. To me, it reeks of “let us observe these strange creatures known as black women,” similar to zoo animals.
Plus, the author’s subtext is disturbing: more black women should marry out, to potentially improve the rates of black marriage. To me, marriage is a non-sequitur in this context, particularly given that some serious cultural issues aren’t magically repaired by marriage (i.e. ability and desire to provide, being an effective father, knowing HOW to maintain a relationship). I mean, I’d hate for a black woman to have her black man propose primarily because he’s afraid of her being taken off the market rather than….wait for it, actually wanting to be married and prepared for that stage. Not to mention how unfair it is for a non-black man to be a consolation prize because a black man isn’t available or willing to marry. But hey….as long as they’re married, I guess.
I get the supply/demand, economics side of it: more black women date out, fewer are available to black men, black men step up their game. Which is fine, for future generations, I suppose. But for the women NOW who want the best partner for them, it’s entirely possible that even willing black men aren’t the best partners because of the aforementioned cultural issues.
I also give the side-eye to any author who misuses statistics, which the WSJ author did in a major way. That 70% of unmarried black women? Includes widows and the divorced. It is also includes age 15 and up. You would think a law professor would either dig a little deeper with the stats or be more more precise in using them.
Now, I’m not denying cultural differences between whites and blacks with the marriage rate. But it’s certainly convenient for these article to throw out that 70%, as if nobody wants da po’ black woman. Not to mention using the quotes of THREE black women as representative of the majority. And when you correct for college education, the marriage disparity between black and white women is significantly smaller.
Thank you for the contribution and sparking this post, Daphne.
GoldenAh:
That article does have an air of “What can we do about these black women no one wants?”, right?
As far back as the 1990s, perhaps even earlier, the NY Times periodically ran articles about the large number of college educated unmarried black women without children along with the high rate of out-of-wedlock births of single black women.
The angle changes somewhat, but it still has the familiar reek of: Black women’s relationships are a problem for society. Although I suspect they really mean, Black women’s existence is a problem for society.
But I’m getting ahead of myself.
Breaking It Down
You did a terrific job of nailing what’s wrong with the WSJ article. It’s not doing us any favors, but it wasn’t meant to anyway. This article insults a number of people, but the main recipients are black women and white men.
Imagine if there was a shortage of marriageable partners for white men, and black women were offered up as the last choice, second rate hope for them, because it would improve their group’s prospects with other, or the same race of, women? Even though they purportedly have a white woman shortage.
Say, what kind of logic is that?
- Logic that reinforces a negative image of black women. So, no surprise a black man wrote that article for a major newspaper that reaches around the world. Anything for a couple of dollars to denigrate black women is not a hard task for some black men. Regardless of how well meaning he thinks is.
- The logic is to continue presenting black women as racially, socially and bizarrely backward thinking: we’re worried about our HAIR, the complexions of our children, and our inability to be comfortable with non-black men. Oh, what superficial, silly, non-normal, non-female creatures we are. We are still “othering” ourselves. Those selected black women presents an image of people living in a self-imposed prison who lack any sense to free themselves of it.
- The logic used is a sneaky backhanded method of blaming black women for the lower rate of black marriage compared to other racial groups. The author cannot directly say that black women must do the asking, since to a mainstream audience it would be outside the norm and viewed as ridiculous. Instead, he indirectly makes the case for marrying non-black men, again like we could make them marry us somehow, to prompt black men into asking.
The key ingredient missing from the entire WSJ article is, What makes a black woman happy? What would make her feel good? What are the ways to approach her if she appears socially remote? Examples of their femininity, their normalcy, or exotic allure, would be enticing to the non-black men reading the WSJ to look at black women positively. It would peal away at least one thin layer of separation between black women and non-black men.
However, making black women attractive, approachable and normal was not the intention of the article.
As you’ve noted, Daphne, the actual purpose is: How do we eventually get black men to do X, Y, and Z? Because it always has to be about them, beginning, middle and ending. People need to let that go and forget about closing the barn door. The horse that ran out is now a great-great-grand mare to her offspring. Black men cannot be cajoled, conned or bribed into marrying black women, especially when they have no desire or interest to do so.
Black women have to be happy on their own terms. I’d respect the mainstream media if there were more articles pertaining to black women, without the insincere hand-wringing, making their own decision to integrate intimately with non-black men: by working with, making friends with, dating and marrying them. And solely for their own benefit.
* The Wall Street Journal – An Interracial Fix for Black Marriage
** The Economist Article – Print Edition – Sex and the single black woman
** The Economist Article – Blog – The unintended consequences of mass incarceration
Tags: black women > interracial > marriage > media watch > NY Times > Wall Street Journal > white men > WSJ
Black Woman: Would You Marry a Blue Collar White Man?
Posted on | August 2, 2011 | 37 Comments
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The Question
Asked of me by C.B.:
If you are educated, would you or have you married a blue collar wm? Many folks are quick to suggest bw take or accept a lower level bm on the academic and economic label. Why is this a problem if a bw marries a wm on a lower scale. (I do know a lady who married a produce manager wm, and she is a phd level. They just had a second baby.)
The Answer
The following is from my personal perspective. It is not intended as follow-what-I’m-doing advice (which is never my intention on this blog), but it’s an example of how I think. Your own dating and marrying philosophy may differ.
Education
About me: I like to joke that I am over-educated. It doesn’t mean I know everything, but I am excessively curious about a lot of things, and I always need to know more. Since I was eight, I loved reading encyclopedias and dictionaries. Today, I enjoy scanning the internet(s) for obscure information.
I used to want to be a fireman, police officer, and an artist. Then I wanted to be an astronaut, research scientist of weird diseases, writer, and a lawyer. My interests continued to change, but my desire for information and knowledge did not.
I graduated from high school, wishing I left a few years early, then proceeded to obtain an Associate’s Degree, Bachelor’s Degree and finally a Master’s Degree. It took a lot of years of hustling to achieve these diplomas. I often worked while attending school, and for the advanced degree, my employer(s) paid for the education.
Do the diplomas make me happy? They were not attained for personal happiness. The purpose of my education is for personal self-fulfillment and is a necessary tool, among others, in working as a “professional” in a white collar corporate environment or pursuing self-employment. For the time being, I am done with obtaining another degree, but I will go for additional certifications and a license or two.
Blue Collar vs White Collar Men
Not all men favor extensive schooling, and they are able to work at not just good, but great blue collar jobs, without a need for a high school diploma or college education. They even make more than anyone in a white collar profession would earn in their lifetime.
I’ve known a variety of men. My Mom likes to tell people I date the United Nations. Some of the men didn’t finish college. Some of them were self-taught in order to work in their office profession.
The odds are always low that I would encounter an available blue collar white man, based on my social circles, work environment and personal interests. In addition to that, based on observation, blue collar men marry earlier than white collar men. They start working right after, or even during, high school right into a stable well paying position, with excellent long term benefits. Whereas the potential white collar worker will spend the next 4-8 plus years studying and putting his life on hold.
Final Answer
I don’t believe I would ever find myself marrying a blue collar white man, because I don’t think we would be a good fit. It is not easy to meet men who like women with a college education or advanced degrees. I don’t care what his race is. I don’t volunteer my educational background unless asked, but once they find out they’ll lose that “loving feeling”.
On the flip side, I will be real here: it is not easy talking or relating to a man with definitive educational gaps. Now, I know everyone who loves exceptions will offer up a spate of their genius IQ high school or college dropout friends*, but I’m talking about what I’ve met on average in the general course of life.
I don’t play Jeopardy with every man I meet, but for fun I’ll look for some indication that this guy keeps himself informed or has an intense interest in anything beyond his nose. Usually, I find that he’s satisfied with his lot in life. Good for him. He will not even have the slightest desire to know more, travel, explore or fulfill some lifelong aspirational ambition. Nope. He’s happy as a pig in s&!t (although, in fact, pigs put their stuff in one corner and do not wallow in it).
But hey, who am I to decide he needs more? So, where he sees bliss, I see stagnation. And I’m happy for the guy, but I realize that we wouldn’t last long as a couple.
My philosophy is this: if I like learning, studying, schooling, travel, and seeking opportunities to explore, why would I expect to get along with a man who doesn’t? I’m old enough to know that I cannot.
* For example, Steve Jobs, Bill Gates, Michael Dell and men like these don’t count in this relationship equation. Steve returned to college to continue learning, but focusing only on classes that served his interests. Gates and Dell left college a number of credits shy of their degrees.
The difference with these men is that they are ambitious, eternally curious and they never stopped learning….
Tags: black women > blue collar > dating > education > relationships > white men
Everclear – Father of Mine
Posted on | July 17, 2011 | 6 Comments
Great song. Very poignant.
I know guys who didn’t grow up with a father, and it will bother them until the day they die. The pain never goes away.
White Women
Posted on | July 8, 2011 | 53 Comments
A while ago, someone sent an email asking why did I not write about white women.
That was funny.
The Proper Focus
At the top of this blog, the stated purpose of this site is to acknowledge the awesomeness of BLACK women. I’ve been accused of being a white man at times (tee hee hee), but I write to promote our self-love.* We get beat down more than other groups or otherwise ignored in the general course of things, unless it is reinforcing a stereotype.
As an ignored group which occasionally receives negative attention, I figure, Why not spend some time on issues that directly or indirectly affect us?
There Is No There There
I don’t write about white women, in general, for this sole reason: they are ubiquitous. They are everywhere, all the time. So much so that the writer of the email was a white woman mistakenly wondering why I wasn’t focusing on her group.
Um, okay.
After I stopped laughing, I wrote back. We exchanged a few emails. She meant well. This was a nice woman who didn’t really understand what the focus of my blog was. She was coming from a white feminist perspective, which is that everything that happens to black women comes through the prism of white women.
In her mind, our lives will always include them, sometimes as the center of attention. Yet in their lives, we are on the periphery as predictable parochial characters. Sorta like every show you see on TV today. Black shows require a white woman. White women shows have a black sidekick or she doesn’t exist except as part of the scenery in the background.
What Does Irk – The Irksomeness
There are, however, some issues, that come to mind about white women:
- Weak Woman Whining: Complaining about being treated as weak women is what I call the femininity gripe. Oh boy, what a wonderful problem to have! Imagine being regarded as a strong like-a-man creature all the time, where no one thinks you are delicate, have feelings, or sensitive? You know, like all other women are? Unfortunately, a lot of black women embrace this othering. White women may want to be strong and manly, and beg to be treated “equally”, but black women want to be seen as feminine, because this whole like-a-man business doesn’t yield “equality” at all. It works as a negation of our womanhood: Hallmark is selling Father’s Day cards aimed at us.
- The Only Woman Self-Delusion: It is irksome expecting us to listen to your problems without reciprocity. When black women launched a movement called No Wedding No Womb (NWNW), white feminists crawled out of the woodwork needing to bandwagon onto the topic, and make it about them. I have never seen so much depraved, immoral preening, and navel gazing. This could not be about black women’s empowerment. Nope. Obviously, somebody had made a mistake: it needed to be about white women, or it wasn’t a valid cause. Sometimes it’s not all about white women, there are issues just about black women. What became clear to me is that if they are not the center of attention, it’s not considered a valid “woman’s issue.” Uhuh.
- Gone With The Flatulent Wind: We’re not at work to be your chambermaid, personal servant, attack dog, or therapist. White women love complaining about male exploitation (same work less pay, harassment, etc), but what about what’s being done to the black women in the office by them? I acknowledge that other people can be just as trifling to black women. I accept and believe that there is a much bigger social benefit to be gained knowing and associating with white women than with other groups, but it’s up to black and white women to re-create balance to normalize and stabilize this relationship.
- Media Stalking – It Is All About You: Some black women do express some frustration when the news media focuses on a white woman to the exclusion of all else. There is a massively overwhelming amount of resources spent on their disappearances, run-away bride stories, trials, reality TV shows, and all manner of attention on these individuals, because she fits the “pretty white woman” profile. All other groups fall by the wayside.
- It’s Not Jealousy – It’s Irritation: Black women benefit when white women benefit. For those of us who have a good understanding of feminism, and the important leading role black women have historically played in it, we understand that it is win-win. We just don’t appreciate when things get whitewashed to remove the first black woman, which is a woman making history too!, when a white woman comes along and finally makes the same record. Then it becomes – the first woman to blah blah blah – when a black woman has already made this distinction. That’s the perniciousness of racism and sexism. So when white women act as if they are the sole victims of sexism, that is irritation at work, not jealousy.
The Casey Anthony Show
I didn’t follow the trial. I originally thought Casey was a guy, and the woman shown in the picture for the news story was his victim. (That’s what I get for skim reading.) The case made me vaguely remember a rash of disappearing / missing children in Florida a few years back, and her kid was one of those stories.
I have two observations that I haven’t read or heard mentioned. 1) Casey Anthony would be in jail if she was charged with manslaughter or murder in the 2nd degree (?). 2) No one on that jury was going to put a “pretty white woman” on death row.
This mistake by the prosecutor reminded me of the OJ trial. (Yeah. Oh boy, here we go.) Marsha Clark thought that all the black women on the jury would identify with the white woman, Nicole Brown, as opposed to O.J. That’s an example of white women being blind to the racial and sexual dynamics of black women. They assume we identify more with them as opposed to that of black men, and many assume we live or die for black men (well maybe a large number do, but not all).
However, those assumptions are wrong, because our reality is completely different from black men and white women. Not every situation where we are concerned will yield an easy checklist of answers, because of our sex or race. People continue to make mistakes in understanding black women due to those assumptions. Sometimes it will be true, more often than not, folks will get tripped up by it.
What Does That Have To Do With White Women?
Nothing at all. That’s why I don’t write about them.
However, it is up to us, as black women to help people understand our distinctive selves.
*Narcissism for Black Women: The Very Good and Healthy Expression of Deep Self-Love, and Extreme Self-Devotion.
Tags: America > black women > center of attention > narcissism > No Wedding No Womb > NWNW > ubiquity > white women
Independence Day
Posted on | July 4, 2011 | 2 Comments
A short note here:
This is not only a day where the country is celebrating independence from its colonial ruler, remember that for you – it can be a day to celebrate your independence from toxic, negative, life-draining, selfish a**h*les!
God bless America.
Happy 4th of July everyone!
Stay in good health and peace of mind, ladies and gentlemen.
Hollywood’s Obsession with Nazis
Posted on | June 20, 2011 | 16 Comments
Missing Pieces of the Puzzle
One of the first scenes in X:Men First Class is devoted to a concentration camp … and Nazis. I turned to my friend, asking, “Why?”
She said, “They are the obvious bad guys.”
When we saw Shutter Island, I wondered. “What do the Nazis have to do with DiCaprio‘s character being crazy?” Maybe I missed something?
Inside Man was a great film. Fantastic build-up of suspension. The Clive Owen, Denzel Washington face-off is terrific. The bank-heist, but not-bank-heist concept was fascinating and riveting. Everything was on point, except for the reasoning behind the act. Let’s just say, it had something to do with – you guessed it – Nazis. It didn’t have to be the driver of the film, because anything more intimate, emotional, and feasible would have made more sense. It didn’t work as the glue that would have held the film together.
Even the over-hyped, critically acclaimed, creepy yet coma-inducing film American Beauty included a coming-right-out-of-left-field Nazi connection. If Chris Cooper’s character was a Confederate flag waving, KKK sympathizer, I could understand the subtext, but that kind of link never gets made. So the significance of the Nazi stuff was never clear to me. As far as I can recall, the film had no black or Jewish people.
Hollywood’s Historical Revisionism
I was reluctant to watch Inglorious Basterds. I avoid films about WWII. It got rave reviews, which made me suspicious. Whether a Hollywood film is good, bad, or indifferent, if it includes Nazis it automatically wins an Oscar. Sort of like being handed a Nobel Peace Prize, because they like the individual. It is not due to a significant paradigm changing action on the winner’s part.
Was it worth seeing? Christoph Waltz and Michael Fassbender (hotness) steal the show. It was an interesting dramedy, entirely tongue-in-cheek. It rewrote history. I wont give away much more than that. However, watching an ultra-blond Brad Pitt (Lt. Aldo Raine) say, “Nazis” with a southern drawl, over and over and over again struck me as bizarre. And his character is named Aldo? Okay.
I get that Raine was doing his patriotic duty at that time. But did America really have that kind of antagonism towards the Germans? I suspect it existed for the Japanese, based on the creation of internment camps. I read that German prisoners of war were treated better than black American troops. During that time, America quite easily turned away Jews fleeing Europe. Plus, let’s not forget the southern pastime of lynching blacks.
I guess historical revisionism makes for “fun” fiction, and that’s what Hollywood does so well.
From Flag Waving Patriots to Something Else
There are two ways of looking at Hollywood’s portrayal of WWII: the time during the war, and the films that came after. Movies were very patriotic from the 1930s to 1950s. Those movies supported the country, its soldiers and citizens. They seemed over-the-top and a bit corny, but they never wavered from the subject of doing the “right thing”: saving a civilization’s freedom and liberty. It had its flaws, but it certainly was better than what the Axis (Germany, Japan, Italy, et al.) offered.
However, once this era passed, Hollywood’s movies shifted from blatant patriotism to something else.
The Indiana Jones film series has always been top among my favorites. Yet I found it odd when he said that he hated “Nazis” in the same vein as snakes. Why did I find it odd? Jones never came across as the flag waving type. Maybe if I saw the films again, that ethos is there, but I never felt that fueled his motives. It was always about the glorification of Jones, not America. He’s a hero for his self-interests, not because he was doing it for the “greater good”.
I also wondered, why would Nazis bother him? The movie franchise showed him in countries, territories, or colonies full of non-white natives he had no trouble shooting at, destroying their environments, ignoring their laws, and all other manner of conduct filled with blatant disdain. How was he any better than the “bad” Germans?
The Easy Choice Keeps Mutating
Movies have been remaking Nazis and turning them into something far worse than ever before. Various genres have cast them as sinister, time traveling, never aging, alien(?), world altering (Hellboy shows us it’s the Nazis’ fault again!), genetic mutating, and all consuming end-of-humanity evil geniuses to be vanquished. With those superhuman superpowers, it’s a wonder the “good guys” ever won, or will win, in these never-ending Hollywood movie wars.
Right. Right. I get that they are the obviously easy choice in today’s multi-polar everyone-gets-their turn-at-being-bad-and-evil kind of world. ‘Cause if the bad guys aren’t Nazis, then it must be an individual from the US military, or the entire government defense apparatus. In today’s Hollywood, it’s one or the other. Absolute patriotism is unfashionable. Plus, there’s a world market to sell out to.
And looking back in this manner to WWII, it is way easier to focus on Nazis than by offending the nutjobs that inhabit the world today.
The Reflection in the Mirror
With each and every film devoted to Nazis in measures big or small, I suspect subjective seepage. In some ways, Hollywood itself promotes a Nazi-like form of white supremacy. Unfortunately, the industry is blind to itself and lacks self-awareness. They are certain that they are the most creative, media savvy, “hippest”, smartest, and quite possibly the most moral, wise and knowing people on the planet. Outside of ensuring they get paid with the same ruthlessness of drug dealers, they are here to bestow knowledge on us dumb and ignorant “little” people.
And don’t we require their sage guidance? Otherwise, movies wouldn’t be filled with these preening dregs of society who often lecture us about what they think a politically ideal, environmentally pure, non-judgmental, perfect world is really like.
Nazis believed that blonds are the ultimate beauty and superior form of humanity. So does Hollywood. The word “blond” is treated as synonymous with “beauty” no matter what that woman actually looks like. Nearly every pale-skinned woman in the media must become a bleached blond. Otherwise, she’s not getting any work. Just glance around and note that every film, every TV show, every cable channel, every news broadcast, and every magazine cover must have a blond woman.
The Nazis wanted to rid the world of “subhuman” (mostly dark-skinned) races to create the perfect society. This elimination theme sometimes creeps into Hollywood films, TV shows, and other venues. Black and minority characters are often the first to die, no matter how idiotically. I can still remember the cheering over the death of that Nigerian character in District 9. Usually, the stupidest scenes are where black people volunteer to be killed: The Taking of Pelham 123 (’09), Mimic (’97), X-Men: First Class (’11), The Shining (’80), etc. I’m sure there’s more, but I’m not documenting every film ever made.
So, When Will the Well Go Dry?
I’m not asking Hollywood to stop making movies about WWII, or any that focus exclusively on the Holocaust, Nazis, blond women, or their favorite character Adolf Hitler. They are free to do so, since it is an easy money maker, crowd pleaser and scores Oscars without difficulty.
At the end of the day, it is all they can think of, since the well of ideas is going dry.
Yet, still, why the obsession with Nazis? I have a hunch that if Germans were deep frying people of color during WWII, there wouldn’t be peep or mention of it in any Hollywood movie what-so-ever. I bet we’d never see a Nazi in any film, sort of like how there’s never any mention, show, or display of slave owners, white American supremacists, small town sheriffs, or national guard members shooting, lynching and killing black people and keeping their body parts as souvenirs.
Is the obsession with Nazis due to some kind of freakish admiration? I believe that their ideology has survived, undergone some mutation, going on to be adopted worldwide via the media and its corrupt offspring the fashion industry. (See designer John Galliano for a clue. He’s not a bug; he’s a feature.)
Then again, adding Nazis to every film could just be a cheap, quick, and lazy rendering of history and riven-of-meaning plot device. Outside of my evaluation, they’re just movies after all, even if people increasingly treat them as historical fact.
Captain America awaits you. Set back in WWII it will, of course, come with no surprises.
Tags: blonds > Hollywood > movies > Nazis
Foster The People – Pumped Up Kicks
Posted on | June 19, 2011 | 1 Comment
Another song I enjoy hearing. Very funky.
They’re nice to look at too.
Continuing The Nice Good … Love Is a Numbers Game, Play It Serious
Posted on | June 12, 2011 | 7 Comments
How to Play It Serious
The best information always comes from the comments section. I’d like to highlight these tips from Lisa:
I started reading BWE blogs when I was 27 and now I’m married at 32. I might still be thinking about all the time I have and feeling that there’s “no rush” if not for reading the blogs.
While there’s never a “rush” for love, there’s also no reason to be waiting around for some man to come along (or some man to shape up and marry you after umpteen years), when you can find someone right now who is ready for something real and serious — and he might just be white!
Wow, it’s been that long?
Lisa offers what changed in her approach to the dating game:
I guess I’d say that the other change I made was taking the process of meeting men a lot more seriously. I used to act in the “if it happens, it happens” mode, so I might have a dating profile up, but if I didn’t receive any responses in six months (for example), I didn’t care. I just figured it wasn’t my time and nothing more.
I later stepped up my efforts (and was successful, yay) and also made it a point to go to more social events. I didn’t have time to hope I met Mr. Right at the supermarket one day, although if it happened that way, it would be nice. I just started making more time to go out (and that does not mean to the club) instead of staying home all the time.
Last night, my husband and I went to a goodbye party for a co-worker who’s moving. While I’m no longer on the market, there were a bunch of single guys there that I would have been checking out… not saying any of them were available, but at least my odds improved by going to the dinner and meeting six unmarried men versus staying at home because I was too tired or something.
Plus, just being in the company of men can help you be a better dater, so that when you do get asked out, you’ll be so fabulous on the first date that he’ll want to ask you out again!
Wonderful testimonial. Each journey begins with the first step. Don’t be afraid. Don’t be hypercritical of yourself. You don’t have to look like [insert name of the latest superskinny supermodel or beweaved singer] to make things happen. Embrace who you are. Start looking. Get social. Make more friends.
Don’t linger on any man who will waste your time. Don’t ever let him get you on the phone talking for hours or more than 10 minutes at a time. Don’t let him text you (heaven forbid now, eh?) a million times a day. He’s wasting your time. This is part of vetting.
Listen to what he says, he’ll tell you what he’s looking for when you ask. And you must ask. Make it clear what YOU WANT. Don’t ever waver. You deserve better.
A Nice Black Man Offers His Perspective on Dating
I appreciate feedback from guys, and so we have the following comment from Bubby.
Well, speaking as a nice black guy, I always tell guys who’re nice who say that they are having problems meeting or finding the right woman, to look harder and to keep at it. Dating is a numbers game and you have to face your fears, face rejection and keep plugging away. If you approach twenty women, four may find you attractive. So sixteen women will tell you, no thanks. Now, are you gonna focus on the negative sixteen or on the positive four?
I chuckle when some of these cats say that women only want “bad boys” or “players”. Women are free to like whatever turns them on in a man and if you’re not what she’s looking for or attracted to, why get angry at her? We all know that men don’t want people telling them what to find attractive in a woman. Move on. There are plenty of women out there who will love and appreciate you but you’ll never find them if you’re too busy throwing yourself a pity party.
I’ve read these so-called seduction sites and they all reccomend that a “nice guy” change or incorporate some gimmick or routine into his “game”. I say be yourself. I say get a hobby. Do things that you enjoy. Get out and explore the world. Take a cooking class. LIVE.
But keep your eyes open and be prepared and willing to approach a woman that you find attractive. Be polite and courteous and see if she’s willing to give you a shot. The rule is: Men approach and the woman chooses.
Truth be told, some of these guys want women to fall at their feet just because they’re nice cats. They don’t want to put any effort into having a love life at all. That kind of arrogance isn’t sexy at all and women will avoid you like the plague.
Hey, you sound like my older brother and his friends!
We all do need to remove anger, hostility, bitterness, and sense of entitlement from our interactions with one another. I think we all improve if we just keep it polite, cordial and cool.
Guys may not realize this, but the fastest way to win a woman over is to be helpful and useful. That’s the one thing that I’m surprised so many miss. I’m not talking about replacing the plumber and being on-call like a hot-line, but showing a woman handyman skills and being reliable, gets you through the right door faster than playing the fool.
And if she cannot appreciate good favors, then at some point the next woman will.
Thank you for your contributions, Lisa and Bubby.
Cheers everyone.
Tags: dating > relationships > socializing
National Dating Standards Lowered
Posted on | June 4, 2011 | 3 Comments
From the Onion, where it’s sometimes hard to tell the truth from fiction.
The goal is to make dating easier for everybody. Notice who the first interviewee is. {{eyebrows raised}}
Yet, I could see the standards board becoming a reality, especially with this “we control everything” government. Of course, it’ll be run by the TSA … since it is a hands-on job.
| YouTube: The Onion – National Dating Standards Lowered |
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