Narcissism for Black Women: The Very Good and Healthy Expression of Deep Self-Love, and Extreme Self-Devotion
Why? Because It's Good For Ya!
And Sometimes I Write about Natural Hair, Among Other Things
Blog Post for Friday: Deep Conditioning / My Own Concoction Friday, June 26, 2009 6:09:00 PM
Washed my hair this evening.
Oh, I love washing it too much.
Yet, I have to. I work out daily. And who wants to be engaging with people with a stinky head? It's so not cool.
I made up a deep conditioning concoction. Made my hair so soft and smooth. Ummm. My hair loves oil in a creamy conditioner. I didn't even have to blow dry. I had no knots! no tangles! very little shedding!
Aside from a few strokes, I did not (ok, barely) have to comb my hair!
Ingredients: Queen Helene Cholesterol, Extra Virgin Olive Oil, White Rain Coconut Conditioner, and the last of my Suave Coconut Conditioner.
I put the mixture into one of those wonderful McDonald's plastic, sorta styrofoam (?) hard cup. I save the cups for henna mixtures too. I stirred my batch last night, and let it sit overnight.
Blog Post for Friday: The Pe(s)t My cat is a 16 pound guy (pest) who tells me when it is time to eat.
In case I don't get the message, he will glare at me for an hour or so. This will be followed by knocking over things to get my attention. Should that fail he'll approach, and try to bite my ankles.
He's a bit of a toe freak too.
If my Mom pets him too much and he's had enough, he'll reach out with his left paw (he's ambidextrous too), and smack her hand away. He'll follow with a right hook and meow like's he's upset.
He's playful, and hits hard.
I don't know how I ended up with such a bad animal. At least he doesn't piss or buries excrement on the furniture. A crazy cat will do things like that.
He's fussy. Muss up his fur and he'll immediately commence to licking himself. He makes me wonder about people who refuse to groom themselves.
He'll look up at me and meow like he thinks I will understand him. Who knows? Maybe on some level I do.
He's very much a lap cat. He's very affectionate. I can barely tolerate hugging people.
So when I've had enough of the purring and staring, I'll toss him off of me.
Blog Post for Friday: Useless Blogging Advice
Rules I read a while ago. What was funny is that some of the most successful blogs break all these rules.
Blog consistently. Every day. Every other day. One must blog all the time.
Blogging about pets is a no-no.
Blogging about babies is a no-no.
Blogging about one topic all-the-time is a no-no.
Blogging about the intricate nonsense of your life is a no-no.
Don't blog while drunk.
Don't ever blog while angry.
Don't create a blog solely to express anger.
Don't create a blog with your real name.
Don't blog with your real name.
Join every social networking website on the Internet.
Don't join every social networking website on the Internet.
Have you opened a Twit(ter) account yet?
Don't open a Twitter account.
Blogs should have a consistent theme, stick with it.
Natural hair: Follow the leader method by FamilyGoingNatural Thursday, June 25, 2009 9:59:00 AM
Oh, she is so correct.
I understand that women are trying to find out what works for their hair, but it is like some don't understand - keep it simple. If it feels "coarse" there may not be a product that softens it up, but if there is it shouldn't be something harsh. A gradual approach - often using less products (1 or 2) is best.
The skin of our scalps is the thinnest part on the body. I don't get why we are so rough with our hair, it's very, very delicate. We have to ease up and leave it alone sometimes, even if we don't think it looks spectacular.
Too many of us are going bald, because we "play" with it too much, and with too many toxic products.
Keep it simple: wash, condition, and keep it moist.
Treat your natural hair with lots of love and affection, then Leave It Alone!
The George Costanza Method Tuesday, June 16, 2009 8:22:00 PM
One of my all-time favorite shows, when I bother to contemplate and can recall it, is Seinfeld. In the beginning, when it was the Seinfeld Chronicles, I used to wonder how long it would last before NBC killed it. It was incredibly funny in a New York area inside-joke kind of way.
In the beginning, the show had low ratings, and there was an air of a show trying to feel itself and what its niche was. The show came alive once the quartet started to gel. Also, back then, I think network executives were more open-minded about letting an audience find a show.
Today, they don't have such patience. I used to watch Reaper (online, since I do not own a television set!), and it was so funny. That was a show where nearly every line and situation was damn near hysterical. What made it funnier is that no one ever chuckled at the jokes and the show didn't have a laugh track.
It was so good. Alas, it was canceled. Today, network executives are looking for instant hits that slowly bleed away their audience as opposed to the opposite track. Good luck with that strategy.
George Costanza
My favorite character was George Costanza.
I once spoke about him with a co-worker, and she loathed him.
I asked, Why?
She replied, He lacked morals, was dishonest, and willing to do anything to get what he wanted.
I always saw Seinfeld as a guy, observing himself, in which his personality was split in four distinct ways. He was an introvert, watching, observing, very detached, and critical. He even admitted in one show that he had all the friends he could manage when another person tried to become a friend of his. That is classic introvert behavior.
Kramer was all impulse (id).
Elaine was the only adult in the group (ego). She was the planner, the studious one, and almost always honest.
Seinfeld was a neat and fussy perfectionist (superego). The show took off once it allowed him to date and evaluate what was wrong with every woman he met. The hilarity with the "man hands" woman, the lady with the one dress, the mutterer, and the designer who forced him to wear a ruffle shirt, among others, are instant classics.
Say what?
George was the composite of all these characteristics, warring with each other, and that's why he was my favorite hot-ass-mess of the show. He seemed to be the only real person on the show.
The show's most pivotal, and interesting point, came when George decided he was going to change from being a loser to finally winning at life. And how did he do it? He was going to ignore his gut feelings, and act on the facts in front of him.
It may have taken George all of his life, but he realized something about himself. His gut instincts suck. They mislead him all of his life. Every conclusion he had reached about social situations, career advancement, and people were completely wrong.
The light bulb went off when he decided to do the opposite of what his gut told him.
Do I believe it?
Fight or flight is a legitimate feeling in some circumstances, but relying on responding to the same situation in the same way, each and every time, is also known as insanity. Your experience and gut instincts have been failing you for some time now.
I don't think it has to be a radical switch, but trying the George Costanza Method every once in a while will yield different results.
Go break the mold, you might be pleasantly surprised at the results.
