Lately, people have been calling me skinny

It’s a weird comment to hear, especially coming from one of the office whales. You know, like if you think I am skinny, what does that make you?

And she sounded exasperated, like how dare I appear so small – at least in her eyes, because I don’t see it. I was told by someone else – who I really regard as “in shape” that my waist appears “tiny”. While I admire the bodies of Mae West, Marilyn Monroe, Jayne Mansfield or Jane Russell, I don’t imagine I look anywhere near those figures.

Somehow this was the year I got my eating under control, but I walk no more than 25 to 50 minutes daily. If time and the weather allows. I really miss weight lifting.

And by the way, my waist is 28 inches, I have to measure my top and bottom again. I haven’t done that in a while. I am aiming for 36 – 26 – 36, if that’s possible. Back in the good ol’ says, those were my measurements.

I eat apples for breakfast, apparently they are natural appetite suppressors. I also eat very few sugary foods, bread, rice and I stick to meat, veggies and fruit that don’t give me gas (LOL) or make me hungry. I confess I like salty and spicy foods. I drink a couple glasses of water when I think I’ve overdone it.

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See? No big deal. And I love big belts.

What’s on your mind?

Update: another belt I love.
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Rapunzalima, Rapunzalima Let Down Your Weave

Went out to a mall a few miles away with my Mother. It’s always a challenge when I go out to eat. At this particular chain (TGI Fridays), they provide no information on their website as to how many calories their food has. It was the only eatery I could find on my GPS, otherwise I would have gone somewhere else.

However, their Vanilla Bean Cheesecake is deadly. It has to be about 600-870 plus calories. It tasted sooooooo damn good. I wont be eating something like that again until next year. It’s that dangerous.

After roaming the parking lot for an inordinate amount of time, we finally find a decent spot. We head inside the “restaurant”. I’m very fussy about where I sit. The seater / host / whatever they’re called asks if we want to sit in a booth next to this couple.

Welcome to the Jungle

I just don’t like sitting close to anyone. I mean, half the restaurant was empty, why sit up under anybody?

So, I said, “No, I like being near the window.” For me, that was that.

We walk past the couple. I hear someone snort? laugh? grunt? in disdain. Okay.

After we’re seated, I glance briefly at the source of the snuffling and huffling out of curiosity.

It’s a Shaniqua* with her “man” (I suppose) L’Trellmont.* She’s totally on the hostility tip. Glaring and staring.

Alrighty, then! Last time I can recall such animosity was over a decade ago. I decide not to look at her again: no point in feeding the animal.

I head off to the ladies room to wash my hands. Can I say, I hate dirty, stinking restrooms? Wow. That place was nasty. Never again!

Upon returning to my seat, I start playing with my shoulder-length twists. I’m shaking, and flipping, my hair off of my face. I’m twirling them. Oh, yeah. Just having fun. Can’t keep my hands out of my hair.

A little while later, I overhear the Shaniqua bark, “Bitch.” Oh wow, it’s that serious is it?

Rapunzalima, Rapunzalima Let Down Your Weave

Finally, they are leaving. Oh wait, she’s leaving.

I finally get a good look at the back of her. She’s not very tall (no offense to the vertically challenged among us). She’s got a very, very long weave styled to look like it belongs on the Disney character Princess Jasmine. Even the blouse looked similar.


Yet, L’Tremont is still at the table long after she’s walked – pardon – sashayed out the door. Did the child even know he wasn’t watching her? He’s staring at me. I raise my eyebrows. He continues to stare. It’s that kind of look.

Folks are so weird these days. Seriously? She thinks I would want him? Did he think I’m interested?

What in the world?

I turn back to my Mom, and tell her about the little non-interaction with these people. She’s surprised.

I shrug, and laugh. Maybe if little girl wasn’t huffing and puffing so much her guy wouldn’t have noticed me. She should have realized – if you want to keep his eyes on you, and the waist length weave, do not bring his attention to another woman with natural hair that you perceive as long.

All that drama. And for what?

I really was complimented by the silly. I didn’t realize I was worthy of so much attention. I’m almost old enough to be the little girl’s Momma, but that never stops the stupidity, does it?

* I don’t know these people’s names. I just made them up. But there is something shared, in looks and behavior, by the people who’ve shown me hostility in the past. So, don’t be offended if this is your actual name(s).

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The Presidential Inauguration: I Am Inspired

I followed the January 20th Presidential inauguration everywhere: at the US Postal Service Office, at an Italian restaurant that serves very delicious individual-sized vegetable pizzas, on my car radio, and when I got home, clips of the parade on the Internet.

My brother and his wife came up from the south to attend the inauguration (and party). He has friends who live in DC. The last time I visited Washington DC was before 2001. After the attacks, I stayed away. It’s funny, because it is less than three hours away. Well, that will change. I will swing down there in early May, or whenever those Japanese flower trees blossom.

Mrs Obama’s Dresses – Black Women and Bright Colors


I like Mrs Obama’s inaugural dresses. I figured she couldn’t be too cold since she’s from Chicago. Plus, when one has to move around like she did that day I doubt it bothered her too much.

However, I know it had to be a different story for the million plus who stood in place for hours on end. I congratulate them, I would have been through in 30 minutes. I have lots of clothing for that type of weather, but I never wait in the cold for any period of time if I can help it. I get sick too easy.

To me, the purpose of the dresses, and as First Lady, was to stand out. She succeeded. I’m happy she did not pick a dark color. I hope she inspires more black women to wear spicy, bright colors: it looks good on us. Nothing perturbs me more than to see a sista wearing black.

With a friend of mine, when we have someplace to go – that’s the first question I ask: “You are not wearing black, right?” She picks something light and bright in color. Fantastic.

Getting in Shape, Again

I am totally inspired by Mrs Obama’s toned shoulders and arms. Wow.


This year I don’t want to be slim, I want to look slender, shapely, and hot. My clothes are drab: too dark, too many pants, and way too loose and roomy. I’m going to get colors that cheer me up. I want form fitting outfits (again). Time to bust loose and feel good. I hate dressing like I am attending a funeral.

It’s hard to find bright colors up here in the Northeast, maybe I’ll see what I can find if I travel to places that sell clothes. No more tourist t-shirts. I want something that screams sexy lady! to wear.

Not a New Year’s Resolution

I’ve lost track of my weight again: the story of my life. I have to start all over again. I have five weeks before I head south for Mardi Gra, I need to exercise now. I have to get prepared for walking a lot and standing in place.

I don’t write down New Years Resolutions – I keep my pc calendar set, along with a to-do-list reminding myself of what my goals are to stay on track.

I’ve busted out the daily eating dairy again: I write down everything I eat, and when, along with the exercise routine. I also include when I wash or rinse my hair. I also visit a few web sites to check my health stats to make sure I am not overdoing it: such as eating too few or too many calories per day. Based on height and level of activity I follow the recommendation of how much to eat and exercise.

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Sugar

There is too much sugar in my oatmeal.

I assumed, wrongly, that this was a great way to start the day. I enjoy a hot breakfast for winter and early Spring. The only thing that instant oatmeal does for me is trigger a ridiculous sugar craving hours later.

I am not a sugar fiend, but that instant oatmeal definitely turned me into one. I cannot tolerate a lot of sugar: it makes me sick. High blood pressure runs in my family. To me wherever there is too much sugar, there’s likely to be too much salt.

Now that the weather’s getting warmer, I’ve switched to one banana. I don’t like any of those “diets” that recommend a slice of whole wheat bread, one egg, an 8 oz glass of orange juice, and some other junk.

That combination is guaranteed to cause a belly ache and make me barf. I kid you not.

Sometimes you can’t win for losing when it comes to food these days.

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Food

The following is a random list of things I love to eat, and what I eat them with. I mostly bake. I don’t like fried foods, except for French Fries.

Meat
Bacon Cheeseburger – medium
Steak – nearly raw, pink
Lamb – with curry
Shrimp
Lobster
Cornish Hen
Tuna
Salmon

I don’t like the chicken that’s out there. Although organic and antibiotic-free chicken are showing up in the stores. I want the non-Frankenstein-big-breast chicken. I still don’t like the way the meat looks or smells. I’ve been cutting back on the beef, haven’t had it in a long time. I don’t like the oily odd chewy taste of it.

Seasoning
Olive Oil
Sea Salt
Black Pepper
Chili Pepper
Curry
Cumin
Tumeric

The spicier the dish, the more I like. I love Indian food.

Bread
Roti

Rice
Long Grain Rice
Spanish Rice
Basmati Rice

I have to work on getting into Brown Rice and cooking it with Coconut Oil.

Veggies, Legumes, Nuts
Spinach – baby
Spinach – frozen
Asparagus – in salads, baked, boiled or lightly salted
Yellow Sweet / Vidalia Onion
Cashews
Chic Peas
Kidney Beans
Portobello Mushrooms
Romaine Lettuce
Pumpkins
Tomatoes (plum, cherry)

Dishes
Samosa
Beef Patti
Pad Thai
Sushi – California Roll, Spicy Tuna Roll
Penne Pasta (Spinach)
Spaghetti (whole wheat)

Fruit, Snack
Dried papaya
Jelly-Belly Beans
Mangoes
Tomatoes

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Weight Loss: Staying on Course

In my daily journal (spiral notebook), I enter the following:

  1. date of entry
  2. weight for that morning, before I eat
  3. exercise conducted

    – period of time of exercise
    – estimate of calories burned

  4. calories to eat for the day
  5. – every meal I eat is subtracted from this total.

There you have it. Everyday, I keep track of: how much I weight, how much I exercise, calories burned and how much I will eat for the day.

It helps a whole lot.

Estimates for calories burned, I get from this site: freedieting.com, and for calories in food: calorie-count.com.

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Weight Loss: glycemic index

I don’t have diabetes, but I do visit web sites that recommend diets for diabetics.

Glycemic index is about ranking carbohydrate foods by how they raise blood glucose levels. It’s that sugar rush one gets after eating something sweet, then getting hungry a short time afterwards.

There are people who are satisfied by eating sweets all day. I’m not one of them. I get sick when I don’t eat properly. Eating sweets makes it worse. I can’t skip meals, maybe only breakfast. I get the shakes five to six hours after my last meal. I would pass out if I don’t eat all day.

It seems like I have a diabetic condition, but I found out that this is something on the order of low blood sugar, the sugar blues, reactive hypoglycemia(?), or hyperinsulinism(?).

I’m one of the few people on the planet that doesn’t like chocolate. I can resist the call of that particular sweet. I get sickly (lethargic and queasy) if I eat a cake with too much icing.

One would think I’d have no weight problems with my disdain for candy or sweets. I’ve never had a cavity, because I rarely ate candy as a child. Instead, I crave salty spicy foods. When the kids on the block wanted lemonade, I made my own version called poisonade. In my lemon drink, I added salt. I added salt to tomatoes and ate them raw.

I’ve cut back on my salt cravings, but my food must be a bit spicy salty to enjoy.

Following a diabetic diet it turns out that highly refined foods are no good. This seems like a no brainer. Avoid foods that are high in sugar, which are processed foods. Stick with raw foods or foods that have been processed at least once.

Does all of this sound familiar? Sure, keep to foods that haven’t had the nutrients removed from it through excessive processing. Seems like the nutso raw foodies were right after all.

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Weight Loss: Eating Healthy

In another attempt to ratchet up my healthy eating habits, I’ve added flax seeds to my diet. I toss in about a tea or table spoon of it to my blended morning breakfast drink. Flax seed is supposed to have all sorts of health properties: Omega 3 and whatnot.

I’m also looking at changing my morning drink to a yogurt / granola / wheat germ type of meal. I haven’t put together the entire mix yet. I don’t want to have to focus on stuff that I can’t purchase at a local grocery store.

Hmm, that’s got me thinking – I need to start adding bits of apple to my morning drink.

Finally, dropped another 5 lbs. I was hovering at the same weight for a number of weeks.

Man, this stuff is hard. I am not one who loses weight easily. Yet, the thing is I have to exercise for one hour daily and I cannot eat over 1400 calories per day. That’s it in a nutshell.

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Weight Loss: What’s For Breakfast?

I was talking with a friend of mine about recipes; she was sharing her vast list with me. I thought back to the Raw foods trend, and how I want to increase my raw or natural food intake. I’m not a foodie, because if I see food I will eat it. There are very few foods I am fussy about.

I used to only have instant oatmeal in the morning. I’d eat it each and every day without fail. I rarely skip breakfast.

A few months ago, I started eating one banana just to pretend I was doing the proper fruit thing in the morning.

Lately, I’ve decided to be more creative since my friend and I were talking about using the food processor / blender for cooking. I haven’t used mine in years. We have kitchens packed with items we buy, use once, and never touch again.

A few weeks ago, I took out my blender. My goal? To create breakfast drinks.

The Bananas Whatever Drink:

  • 2-4 ounces of water,
  • 2-3 baby carrots,
  • 1 banana (you could use half – my drinks are very thick),
  • squirt of lemon (optional),
  • ginger (optional sprinkle),
  • cinnamon (optional),
  • cranberries (optional),
  • and last but not least half of a plain low-fat yogurt cup.
  • Sometimes I’d add about 2 cashews or almonds.

Into the blender the entire mix goes, and that’s breakfast. Doesn’t make more than an 8-12 ounce glass. I drink this with multivitamins, followed by a glass of water, right before I work out.

The Breakfast Alternatives Drink: sometimes I leave out the bananas, cinnamon, and cranberries. I find that I like to add more carrots and add some fake sugar. Anything to switch up the drink.

I think my drinks are a nice tasting low calorie nutritious meal. They don’t qualify as raw, but it’s a change from having just oatmeal.

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Weight Loss: The Holding Pattern – Part 2

There are many emotional issues behind the holding pattern regarding weight loss. I’ve certainly had my share of them.

Why the weight comes back or more won’t come off:

1. Getting tired of it. The exercises become boring. The body is adjusting to the torture, um, exercise and after a while I need to find new tactics. The incentive seems to fade, why am I doing this again?

2. Weather changes: Now, it’s too hot / too cold to begin that exercise routine today. I put it off. Next thing I know, six months have past and I’m over 30 lbs overweight again.

3. Emotional triggers: I get upset over something. Next thing I know, I’m wolfing down that salty snack I’ve been depriving myself of for the last few weeks.

Well funk that, I’m eating what I want, when I want, so there! After the binge, I feel horrible and eat more.

4. Unwanted attention: On some level (as an introvert) I likes being ignored as the “thick” or “fat” person. People accept me as I am. I’m the same person in a new body. I start to wonder, why weren’t these folks friendly before the weight loss? Shallow bitches.

5. Unwanted attention: Yeah, I know I’ve lost a lot of weight. Did I require your permission? (Some people don’t like you changing on them.) How many effing damn times are you people going to talk about how I look now? Did I ask your effing opinion about my weight? No? Then shut up about it.

There are people who think if you lose weight, you are doing it for them. WTF? Health is the number one consideration for weight loss.

6. Unwanted attention: The worst (to me) is attracting the eyes of men I didn’t want even when I was “fat” or “thick.” It makes me long for the days when I was chunky enough to be ignored by these guys. Hmmm. Maybe being 30 lbs overweight did have its advantages.

7. Unresolved issues and keeping it off. If losing weight is the goal, when is it accomplished? The hardest part is keeping it off, because if the exercises have to be heavy duty strenuous to get to this itty bitty size, and the food has to be constantly monitored, it becomes self-defeating. It must become a consistent, everyday good habit.

8. Unresolved emotional issues– Weight has been lost, yet if the “other” problems haven’t gone away, then nothing has been accomplished. The weight will come back and with a vengeance.

9. Don’t care – at some point, the indifference (to appearance) will return. So what, if I take an extra bite? So what, if I didn’t exercise? What’s the difference? And then the vicious cycle begins again.

10. The injury – I lose count of the number of times I overdid it on the treadmill. I would stop exercising, and this stoppage turned from days into weeks and into months.

11. Too much energy – when I start working out, I turn into this hyperactive child. I am so “psyched” and full of energy that I need to exercise even more. It’s similar to drug addiction, I need to work out more to hit my next high.

If I don’t, I may get so blue, depressed and down in the mouth that I stop exercising. So each time I work out, I have to up the ante. I’ve gone up to 90 minutes of walking, 85 minutes of running / walking on the treadmill, and stationery cycling at 13 speed for one hour. I do each exercise every day. For now, I never take a day off.

I know it’s coming. I’m going to crash when I reach my limit…

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