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For Black Women: Please Have Sex With White Men

Posted on | August 12, 2010 | 117 Comments

That got your attention, didn’t it?

Apparently, my old, old post Why White Men are a Better Choice was interpreted (by the mentally handicapped and functionally illiterate) as a heartfelt plea for black women everywhere to sex it up with all the nearest and available white men.

It seems that I’ve been successful at convincing “quality good black women” to go find themselves a white man and ignore all the “good black men” a.k.a. purple unicorns out there. I had no idea I had so much power.

Will everyone please help make me a multimillionaire?

I never mentioned sex. I mentioned marriage. Quite delightfully, black women who are married to or dating white men provided the most lovely, heartfelt and wonderful testimonies and feedback. Nearly all of them wanted or had a husband, nearly each and every one of them was reasonably happy with a man, who happened to be white, who treated them with respect, love, devotion, and protection (emotional and financial).

As far I’m concerned, a happy black woman is a wonderful thing. Interesting how people who worry about black women having sex with white men, never concern themselves with her happiness. Well, it’s because they don’t care about black women in the first place, but we already know that.

You’ve Heard This Propaganda Before

I’ll briefly go over the reasons people are against black women / white men unions. Tell me if it all doesn’t sound familiar.

In the following paragraphs, the “he” I’m referring to is a white man.

  1. He (the white man) just wants sex. Ans. So? Men like sex.  So do a healthy number of women. I’d be disturbed if a guy was with me and didn’t want sex. I don’t mean jump in the sack immediately, but if he never showed any attraction, I’d be like: What’s up with that?
  2. He’ll use you and leave you. Ans. Black women are having more children out of wedlock with the “brothas” than those married to purple unicorns.
    • LeBron James recently referred to his baby mama as a “sidekick”. Isn’t he supposed to be a purple unicorn? He’s leaving the sidekick and spawn behind while he seeks out lighter and brighter pastures in Miami. Anyone want to put money on a bet that his next chick will be Latina or white and he’ll want to marry her?
  3. White men raped our great-great-(number of greats may vary) grandmothers. Ans. I wont trivialize slavery or Jim Crow or any era people suffered through. However, I’m not a slave, and I’m not living in the past.
    • Today’s white man isn’t the one raping and abusing black women in record numbers (see Dunbar Village and other atrocities). Plus, with the number of black men chasing down, co-habitating, and marrying white women, it is apparent the “brothas” have forgiven white women for getting black men lynched back in those days.
    • Black men have no problem treating white women like queens, giving them all of his money, and by extension white men. I’ve always noticed that if a negro makes a lot of money, the first thing he’ll do is find a white woman to give it to.
    • So what’s wrong with a black woman being with a white man who will marry her, stay around to raise the kids, provide financial support, and all that good stuff?
  4. His johnson is pink. Ans. Don’t underestimate the power of pink. Your stuff is pink too. (TMI coming: the color of his johnson may vary anyway.)
  5. His johnson isn’t big. Ans. How would you know the actual johnson size of 100 plus million men? Yes, that’s right there are over 100 million white men in America. Do all the black men who keep telling you this: have they peeked at all of them? Do all the black women who claim this: have they slept with all of them? And why are they obsessed with that?
  6. He can’t satisfy a black woman. Ans. At least he’s willing to use his tongue. For hours. Nuff said.
  7. It hurts black men to see black women with white men. Ans. Do any of those negroes out there who talk about how perfectly beautiful or hot the Kardashians, or any white women they are with, worry about any black women’s feelings? Don’t you get tired of hearing: “Black women are this and that – that’s why I only date white women”?
    • Whether the black male is a family relation, friend, or a stranger you call a “brotha” who you date, sex, mate, and marry is really NONE OF THEIR BUSINESS. Their overinflated, easily bruised, excessively touchy, delicate and fragile egos are not worth the PRICE OF YOUR HAPPINESS. Frankly, if these negroes aren’t taking care of you and yours they need to GET LOST with a quickness.
    • Their opinions aren’t worth a bucket of warm spit, and mine isn’t either. I’m certainly not here to tell you what to do.
  8. White men don’t find black women attractive, or they will not make you a wife. Ans. Does the number who are attracted really matter? You only need one good man.
    • White men / black women have the lowest rates of divorce, even over white men with white women, and especially black men married to anybody even black women. Your own personal mileage will vary.
    • At least with white men you can statistically find one that will actually like your hair, your complexion, your beautiful skin, your loving spirited personality, and just be into you, because you are an AWESOME BLACK WOMAN.
  9. Your children will grow up confused. Ans. This last one is my hypothesis: folks just don’t want to see the children of black women by white men receive the kind of privileges some white children have. If all black kids are in dire straights together people are comforted by that. However, if the exception turns out to be these children….
  10. Good black men exist! Ya’ll just want thugs. Ans. I never said disregard purple unicorns. If a black woman, or anybody, can find those extra 2 million plus purple unicorns that black women need for companionship, then wonderful!!! You’ve achieved a major miracle.

Now, that I’ve gotten that out of the way, I’ll repeat the header: Please have sex with white men.

***
Update: I’m always thrilled to get input by men. Frank M. just knocks it out of the park!

Betty.  I decided to write my own answers for their arguments.  Feel free to use or just read if you’re interested.

1.    He (the white man) just wants sex. Ans.  Companionship, friendship, and emotional support during good times and bad are just as important in any relationship.  BW, in my experience, are fiercely loyal and supportive to those they love, so choosing to date a BW is NOT just about sex.  How can BM use this argument with a straight face with all the fatherless kids running around the BC anyway?  If anyone has PROVEN (through their actions) and promoted (through their music) that they just want sex, it’s BM.

2.    White men raped our great-great-(number of greats may vary) grandmothers. Ans. What is more of a danger to a BW today?  A man who has been dead for a hundreds of years??  Or the group of men harassing her on the street today?  BM don’t rape?  African countries are dealing with rape at epidemic proportions.  And that is in within THIS decade.  Rape within the black community in America is swept under the rug, but we all know it exists.  I would argue that within the last 100 years, rape of BW is done by BM, not WM.

3.    His johnson is pink. Ans. Actually it’s light brown, but thanks for being interested. LOL

GoldenAh: I fell out of my chair at this one. 😀

4.    His johnson isn’t big. Ans.  Judging by the compliments I’ve received from bw in bed, it’s big ENOUGH.  LOL.  All jokes aside, part of the reason BM are in the position they are in is because they judge too much of their masculinity and pride on something that doesn’t define a man.  Being a man is about a lot more than your physical body.  Choosing to identify all of your self-worth on one body part you had no control over is idiotic.  This myth came from racists attempting to scare WW out of fornicating with blacks due to potential injury.

As humorous as that sounds, BM took this racist myth and made it a source of pride.   They did the same thing with the “N” word.  Neither of those reversals of racist ideas has benefited BM or black people in general.  It’s time to let go of both of these.  Most of us (non-BM) aren’t buying it anymore either.  We’ve seen too many examples of BM who aren’t packing and it only gives all the average-sized BM an unnecessary inferiority complex that leads them to try and “prove” their manhood by acting like hyper-sexual, aggressive, violent homophobes or the super black militant crazies who secretly date WW.  LOL Ok that last part was my personal theory.

5.    He can’t satisfy a black woman. Ans.  (Rolls eyes)  Why?  Are they are different species?  Didn’t seem all that difficult to me.  If they keep coming back for more, maybe I’m doing something right?  I’ve met tall, thick, big-hipped women with smaller “canals” so the idea that they can’t be satisfied due to body type is ridiculous.

GoldenAh: Men can be so frank. 😀

6.    It hurts black men to see black women with white men. Ans. Whose issue is that?  Hers?  Or yours.  Get over it.  Seeing WW with BM makes me feel nothing.  She doesn’t belong to me, and I don’t possess her just because we happen to have a similar skin tone.  Once again, get over it.  Stop living in the past, plz. Thx.

7.    White men don’t find black women attractive, or they will not make you a wife. Ans. I am a heterosexual man, therefore, I am attracted to WOMEN, of any race.  I can’t help it, it’s in my biology.  Neither can women.  If anyone to say they are not attracted to an entire ethnicity, they are LYING .  As for making a BW a wife?  Hundreds of thousands of WM have and it is the fastest growing IR union in the USA. Theory over?

8.    Your children will grow up confused. Ans. Children are individuals, and they can only be confused if they allow themselves to be confused by listening to negative/divisive opinions about who they are or should be.  Think Obama is “confused”?  Seems like a pretty well-adjusted evolved human to me.  “Pure-raced” young people feel confused all the time so that theory holds no water for me.

9.     Good black men exist! Ya’ll just want thugs. Ans. Wrong.  Women want confident, secure individuals with strength.  If thugs are the only BM’s projecting these qualities, then those of you weaker (Beta) BM might need to work on your self-confidence and attraction skills.

Also, in the white community, the alpha males are the most successful, not the least.  You won’t see them them hanging out on street corners looking “fly” or languishing in prison. And for the BM who are doing legitimately well, they seem to choose the lightest, brightest BW or non-BW who will have them.  This doesn’t leave a lot of attractive BM’s for BW to choose from.

What are they supposed to do?  Or that’s right, wait for you to come along, so you can string them along until you are done using them for your own personal desires. LOL I think BW are finally wising up to that game.

GoldenAh: As we can see here, even by casual observation a white man can see the game being played on black women. Wooo.

Awesome feedback, Frank M. Thanks.

😀

***

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Comments

117 Responses to “For Black Women: Please Have Sex With White Men”

  1. yellowmoon
    August 12th, 2010 @ 11:36 AM

    Oh no, you didn’t!

    I am ROTFLMBAO. Perfect, absolutely perfect.

    My comment on the sex thing? Unless you are one of those few women that can achieve sexual nirvana from vaginal intercourse only, you’re always going to be better off staying away from the brothas. Cause that is basically their thing, and nothing else. There’s nothing else in that bag of tricks. They can’t even use their hands at the same time. In and out, in and out, and then they’re gone.

    And size? Give me a break! Most black men, like most white men, are not packing like those guys you see in porn movies. Everyone is pretty much average. That’s why they call it average, because that’s what most guys are.

    If you are a black woman and you’re letting anything having to with sex influence your decision to date white men, then I feel sorry for you. YOU are missing out, and not just in terms of general happiness you could be experiencing in your life, but you are also missing out in that specific area, the sexual part of it. I’m very happy I made the switch, it is GREAT.

    GoldenAh: Great comments, yellowmoon. Thank you! 😀

    I just think it’s time for (certain) people to leave black women alone, regardless of who we will, or will not, be with. We’re entirely free to discuss our relationships, or our search for them, in whatever context and way we want.

    If I flipped this list – I could have easily called it The 10 Best Ways to Keep a Black Woman Alone, Single, and Frustrated.

  2. yellowmoon
    August 12th, 2010 @ 12:10 PM

    Another thing:

    Despite my online name, I am dark. Yup, a dark-butt. I’m slim, and I’m attractive, but I’m dark. Really dark. And I wear my hair short, with some relaxer in it, but no weave, no straight hair (not even bangs). Just loose curls.

    GoldenAh: You are dark and lovely. No “buts” about it. And non-black men clearly see your beauty.. 😀

    This is like some kind of poison to most of the color-struck brothers. It seems bizarre on the surface, but it’s like catnip to a lot of the white men that are interested in black women. I don’t know why, and I don’t care, I just enjoy all the attention.

    GoldenAh: I was someplace recently with a lot of black males loitering around. One of them saw a girl about Queen Latifah’s complexion chatting with a dark chocolate girl. Could you believe what he did next? He stood up, pointed at her, and said loudly, “Yeah, dat light skinned girl right there. She look nice. She’d know how to treat a man.”

    No one batted an eyelash or looked at this fool. Even his homies wouldn’t speak to him for a few minutes after that declaration.

    And what color was this genius? Straight up black. No chaser.

  3. Jemma
    August 12th, 2010 @ 4:56 PM

    One big difference between going out with white guys and black guys is that no white guy has ever tried to talk his way out of using a condom with me. Also, if you get pregnant from a white guy, you either get married or he pays child support, because I’ve seen it happen three times already over the past five years – two marriages and one arrangement with partial custody and generous child support.

    It is just plain stupid to believe that all white men are good guys, but I’d rather take my chances in that group of men than within the black male population. I hate saying it, but most black men are incredibly irresponsible when it comes to spreading their seed. And once they knock a girl up, then that woman is labeled a “golddigger” for expecting that the black father support the child that he helped bring into the world. WTF is that all about?

    BTW, those two marriages are still going strong, so tell me again how white men don’t want to marry black women?

    GoldenAh: I know none of us mean ALL when we speak in generalities. So no one on this blog has to worry about being taken out of context. Clarification and making exceptions isn’t required. You’re free to wing it. 😀

    White men have a healthy, normal, vested interest in the well being and advancement of their offspring. Considering the history of black people one would assume black men too, but I’m puzzled by their lack of concern.

    If they don’t want children they can take plenty of temporary to permanent preventative measures. None of them are “trapped” into producing children.

    Black women who are exclusively into black men have to start holding them to the same high standards most, if not all, women have for men, because black children are clearly suffering, lagging, and regressing as a result of giving these guys so much slack.

    Thanks for the examples, Jemma. Real life speaks so clearly on these situations. 😀

  4. Boston
    August 12th, 2010 @ 7:27 PM

    dontcha just looooove it when some ignant motherlover takes 1 or 2 sentences out of a 10 paragraph post, twist it and tried to tell you what you said. but my 2 favorites are when they say: your kid will be confused. my response? i’d rather him be confused by a white daddy than be confused by not knowing who his daddy is.

    and my 2nd favorite? there are good black men. of course. there are. but we also have 4-leaf clovers, great white wales and tiger sharks doesn’t mean i’m gonna go look for them either. my eggs have a shelf life. i don’t have time to be going on a hunt that might or might not produce results.

    GoldenAh: I call “good black men” purple unicorns, because their existence is besides the point. I wouldn’t care if black men (in regards to potential relationships) all became purple unicorns, or disappeared, it has no bearing on my interests in men. I wouldn’t miss them, because I like all kinds of men. I always have, since the time I was aware of boys. 😀

    For those of us who like non-black men, whether that includes black men or not, we don’t have to explain our interests. We don’t have to explain the reasons why we like MEN. To me it’s like explaining why I like water, or enjoy breathing.

    It’s just the arrogance of people who assume that the lives of black women is something they have the right to dictate to. For a number of people black women are a resource to use, not a person with her own life, agenda, and sense of direction. I find that concept hilarious and contemptible. No one controls me. I’m not a mule.

    Thanks for stopping by, Boston! 😀

  5. Jemma
    August 13th, 2010 @ 11:09 AM

    GoldenAh – yeah, I’ve heard black guys say that before, that they were “trapped” into having children, because the woman “shouldn’t have let me have sex with her if I didn’t have no protection”.

    It’s the woman’s fault for agreeing to have sex without a condom, which os what the guy was trying to talk her into in the first place. This is the Bizarro World that black men live in.

    But one thing I do want to say about the two marriages I mentioned is that both of those couples were already on the way to being married. The pregnancy news just sealed the deal, that’s all. One of those couples has since had another kid, and my friend is now a stay-at-home mom, which she loves. They have a pretty good life and a nice, happy family.

    Even the other situation where my friend took a pass on getting married (he wanted to marry her) has worked out okay, there’s never any problem with the child support payments, the father has partial custody, and the little girl’s white grandparents are just CRAZY for her. They treat her like a little princess, nothing is too good for her. They have already enrolled her in private school for her future education, and she’s only 3 years old! That is some stuff, there.

    I would tell any sista that asks, expand your relationship options! You’re a beautiful, desirable woman first, and the fact that you’re also black is way down on the list. Being black should not be the determining factor in who you date.

    You are not restricted to being with black men, no matter what anyone tells you!

    GoldenAh: Even the white grandparents are chipping in to help! Awesome. 😀

    That’s what I truly think is behind some of the anti-bw/wm coupling. These children will be privileged. I think black people have reached a mindset that prefers to hear about 1 in 5 black children growing up in extreme poverty. It’s become normalized for black children to be viewed as: dysfunctional, impoverished, deprived, and broken. There’s this thinking of “let’s keep the children 110% pure black and poor” as opposed to (oh, horrors!) possibly being mixed and well off.

    I haven’t seen any blog topics covering this, but I wonder if black women are being shamed from having light or mixed children, because it’s goes against some sorta phony black nationalist keep-the-black-numbers-high agenda. It’s okay if black men do it, because his kids are “still black”, and will end up like most black kids, but I suspect black women are getting particular flack in this area.

    A black woman shouldn’t let artificially imposed racial guilt bind her and end up limiting her children’s future. She needs to find men who care about their offspring. It’s only going to get more competitive out there, and children need all the advantages they can get. That’s how all women who want a stable family think. There’s nothing self-hating about it.

    Living just to struggle isn’t pretty, authentically black, or worthwhile.

    Lemme get off my soapbox.

    Have a good weekend. 😀

  6. Bellydancer
    August 13th, 2010 @ 12:55 PM

    Being single and childless I get my share of looks because I refuse to have a child out of wedlock and do not think I will ever have children. It’s like you are weird for having these values and wanting your child to have a good advantage over his/her peers.
    The only way to do this is to give your child a good start in life.
    Another thing these cretins are the first to point out that mixed children are exclusively black like that makes them feel better because your child is going to good schools, camps etc…they will also jump and try to date mixed women first chance they can.
    Hating mixed children for their skin and yet trying to get with them for perceived advantages.

    GoldenAh: You are right on the money. 😀

  7. funkystarkitty50
    August 13th, 2010 @ 4:59 PM

    I stopped justifying my preferences a long time ago. Now, I don’t live to please other people especially those who want to question my Blackness. I’m sick of the stigma that BW who are involved with WM = Self Hate. On the contrary, to go after what you want and being authentic about it, is nothing but “Self Love”.

    GoldenAh: Yup, high five. 😀

  8. Southland Diva
    August 13th, 2010 @ 5:29 PM

    @Bellydancer,

    You are not weird.

    I am single, CHILDFREE and over 40. I never wanted to have children out-of-wedlock. And I haven’t. Suprisingly I am okay with it. I have a neice I can help parent (her parents are married) and a busy life.

    I don’t know how old you are, but do not wait for the purple unicorn! Go global and find someone with whom you can share your life. Children are optional.

    Peace

  9. sistuhwuman
    August 13th, 2010 @ 5:32 PM

    Goldie, you are hilarious! And this is so exactly right, too.

    Girls, take it from a another traveler on that same journey you’re on right now, and one that has been down some rough roads and blind alleys. There are a lot of white men that would like to have your company, even if they themselves don’t know it yet. Almost every white guy in America has never yet had the opportunity to have a conversation with a normal, attractive, interesting black woman, Most of them have had little or no interaction with black women like us.

    And when they get that opportunity, watch out – sparks will fly!

    This will happen for you, sooner or later, if you want it to to happen. Keep smiling at white men – they’re not used to it, but, sooner or later, one of them will be captivated by your beautiful smile.

    GoldenAh: Ladies! Listen to sistuhwuman! She has a wonderful Mr. Brooks Brothers as a husband. (Too bad his brother is taken. Le Sigh.) This is sage advice! 😀

    {{Stepping away from the mic.}}

    Glad I made you laugh. 😀

  10. Keena
    August 14th, 2010 @ 3:02 PM

    Having been on both sides of the racial equation between white me and black men, I have to cosign with yellowmoon about the brothers and their limited interest in anything except hitting it. Not much variety there.

    Conversely, these white boys will take you to school in bed, and I for one am all for some variety.

    And, Golden Ah, you are so right about the tongue action (wink)! A sister has to love that. At least I do!

    And I’ll tell you something else. My white boyfriend has some pretty impressive equipment, which is always a good thing, no matter what you’re doing, but the point is that he ain’t no one-trick pony. Like most of the brothas I’ve been with. Know what I’m saying? Just being real, here.

    GoldenAh: Ah, man. LOL. I think my face is turning red. It’s all good though. 😀

    Great to hear from you, Keena.



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